Another after another.

How many times do you feel like giving up, but still holding on, staying strong? I'm so tired of hearing family members or others saying Bad dog. or family members would say "She's just a mongrel. Don't waste so much effort on a dog like this." Mum would say after the trial " She's just dumb, she couldn't do anything. I think she should stop training." Sisters would say " Noob dog, stupid dog." Before the trial, I told myself It's ok if she dosen't do well. It's alright. I told myself not to cry. That day I went home at night, I took her for a walk alone to the park. I unleashed her collar and let her ran. I myself, took off my slippers and ran the basketball court bare footed. I ran and kept running. Till my feet was finally hurting, I cried. I sat on the floor and cried, till my best friend came. She licked my face and just stared at me wondering what was wrong. I kept telling her it's ok, it's ok. but I wasn't.then I cried even more. That night, I cried to bed. After the next day, I kept asking myself "Why is other dogs getting better and better. and mine? Nothing changes.but gets better to worse?" I remember running the course for the first time with her. We got over time, I didn't called her or anything. I was nervous, I didn't dared to run. I was afraid. Then after that, I put her inside the crate. People came around asking me to talk to her, talk to her. you have to talk to her. I got even more nervous. The second round, she got better at first.I was still Really scare but I was talking to her. I thought she got better cos She was jumping and going in the tunnel smoothly, then we've to missed the tyre cos she was cared of it. Then we through in another tunnel and she didn't want to jump anymore She was trying to escape I kept calling her and she got over she look around and then I still kept calling her till she ran back to her crate. Then I looked at mr.chan and i took the leash, I saw the timer it says 42.56? and walk out the ring. I was completely disappointed then I feel like nothing but a failure.When I was leaving I saw the results on the board.. Others think it's just a waste of time. But can't they see it? I'm trying to fix things, I'm trying to help this dog.I love this dog with all my heart, I didn't cared how horrible she is. I'm trying to fix it. But why? Why another after another, it has to get better to worse. I'm trying really hard.. I'm trying to prove others wrong about her. but was I wrong now ? It frustrates how she could ignore other dogs in training and just listen to me or just do amazing at home but jumping in straight line in a trial is too much for her.I tried, I ignore what people said. I fell, but i got back up and I didn't give up.I really want to fix things, but I just don't know how to anymore.